I devote an entire chapter of the Essential Major Donor Toolkit to the ask meeting. How do you structure the meeting? What stories do you tell and in what order? And how to make the ask itself, along with what comes after the ask.
Here’s a quick primer on what comes after the ask:
Immediately after the ask: Stop talking. You asked a question. Let them answer it. If you start talking again to cover up your own nerves, you can get sidetracked or actually decrease the odds of a donation of the amount requested.
If the donors says maybe: If the donor says, “I’m not sure” or “I have to think about it” or any of a dozen maybe variants:
“Thanks so much for considering a donation.”
Then ask an open-ended question. Get them talking so you can understand what they’re thinking. Possible questions:
- What do you think of our plans?
- What do you like best about our work?
- What more do you think we should be doing?
On more than one occasion when I did this the donor became a yes in answering the question and I walked away with a check. They needed time to think, but the time could be just a minute or two and they could emotionally and mentally process while they were talking about the organization.
Of course, that usually doesn’t happen. So you should then say something appropriate riffing off their answer and bringing it back to your own case/story that speaks to their priorities/interests.
And then if it seems promising based on their answer to your open-ended question: re-ask for your original dollar request (or perhaps a smaller request if that seems more appropriate).
Example: “I’m so glad to hear you’re excited about our PROGRAM/ACTIVITY. Our ability to plan and implement that work over the next few months goes up as we get more donations and pledges. Is a DONATION AMOUNT gift something you can do this year?
Of course, if they say that they need more time at this point, don’t ask a third time during the meeting.
“I really appreciate your taking some time to think about making a significant donation this year. Can I circle back in a week to see what you’ve decided?”
Giving a firm timeline to circle back is important so that you’re not left with the awkwardness of not knowing how quickly to get back to them.
If the donor says yes: Thank them and then work out the timeline for their gift.
Example: “Thanks so much! I really appreciate your stepping up so we can have a bigger impact. Would you like to make the donation via check today or would you prefer to mail a check or give in some other way?”
If they’re going to send it later/go online: “Can we count on your donation by the end of the month?” (Or “end of next week” if the ask is taking place near the end of the month).
If the donor says no: “Thanks so much for taking the time to meet with me. I appreciate you have other priorities right now.”
Then try to figure out if this is a firm no or a “not now.”
“Would you like me to follow up in 6 months to see if your priorities line up at that point with our needs?”
Or: “Would you be open to discussing a gift in the future? If so, when would be a good time to circle back to you?”
For everyone:
Regardless of whether you’ve had a maybe, yes, or no, ask:
“Do you have any friends or colleagues who you think would be interested in investing in our work? And, if so, would you be willing to send an introductory email or text for me?”
Closing out the meeting
Thank them for their time if a “no.”
Thank them for their “consideration” if a maybe.
“Thanks again for your donation” if a yes.